Java Zen:Thinking Out Loud Thursday, 2018.03.22
I Answered All My Spam 

I never know what I might find,
on any day I go online. 
I used to get in quite a huff, 
while wading through unwanted stuff. 
But then I changed the man I am, 
the day I answered all my spam. 

Now every time I check my box, 
I load up on fantastic stocks. 
I'll gladly say I felt no loss, 
when, with a smile, I fired my boss. 
With just one click, the best thing yet, 
I freed myself of all my debt. 

I have, paying a few small fees, 
ten university degrees. 
Now that I'm losing all this weight, 
I'm sure, someday, I'll get a date. 
Instead of going to a show, 
I spy on everyone I know. 
(That's easy, since I have in hand,
this nifty wireless video cam.) 

I spend my evenings viewing screens,
of barely legal horny teens. 
And with a little credit charge,
Whoopee! My penis was enlarged! 
Meanwhile these shots of Britney Spears
should be enough to last for years. 

And so I lead this online life, 
my monitor is now my wife. 
It has become my greatest dream, 
to launch my own get-rich-quick scheme. 
And if you think you might get missed, 
relax, you're on my e-mail list. 

by Alex Silbajoris, Columbus, Ohio 
2001 Freestyle Winner
Satirewire's 2nd Annual Poetry Spam


It’s a Beautiful Thing

It’s all in the setup. Months in the making, the Java Zen weblog is now on line. Whew. It’s time to lift the cap from a homebrew (an Imperial Stout, no less), kick back, and do a little free association. Where else is one to find enough garbage to fill this space?

Java Zen is still the place to find interesting items not suitable for blogging as well as the archives for the Friday Humor Break and Wha Zappenin’. I’ll be moving some of the older stuff from Java Zen and else where to this blog site as time allows. Sheesh. Some of us were blogging before blogging was cool.

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